"Keep the fights clean & the sex dirty!!!"

When asked the key to his long & successful relationship, actor Kevin Bacon was quoted as saying "You have to keep the fights clean and the sex dirty" - I don't know if anyone else could hear it but inside of my head I heard a scream of glee "YESSSSS!!!" Finally somebody gets it! It's that secret that the very rare couples are able to understand, appreciate and execute ;o) This quote is enlightening considering it comes from a man who has been happily married for 20 years now!

If you can maintain your sexual attraction to one another, keep the sex you're having intriguing & spicy you will benefit by staying connected to the level of excitement that first brought you together. The thrills of sex don't have to end at the 3 month mark. Lust and desire can endure - the secret - wanting it to... After all, couples who are still having great sex are bonded on so many other levels as well. It's unlikely that you'd be having continued sex-fun with a partner who, outside of the bedroom bores you or disrespects you or who you no longer enjoy being around. A great sex life in an extended relationship is proof of the health of your compatibility.

In a Redbook article Kevin Bacon & Kyra Sedgwick give their top 5 relationship tips - all of which, I believe are intertwined and have to 'click' into place just right (hence, the rarity of happy, long term relationships)...

1. Have trust that your significant other is always going to be there with you...

2. Make time for each other - keep your relationship as a couple strong, it's the foundation on which everything is built...

3. Always take time in life for yourself. (Plus, independence is a turn on)...

4. Make your family a priority, this gives you perspective to separate the small stuff in life...

5. Be a support system for your spouse, talk, and talk a lot...


The comment about keeping the fights clean is also very key to long term success. I am always stunned at what couples will say and how they will treat each other when it comes to fights. The majority of people out there will be more demeaning & insulting to their partners then they EVER would be to a complete stranger?! It's mind boggling!!!???!!! Fights occur in the best of relationships, no doubt.. it's HOW you relate to one another that is vital. If you can learn to be constructive in your differences, speak to each other with decency and courtesy you will find that your challenges, may in fact, create an even tighter bond.


I think most everyone aims to have a relationship that they are completely fulfilled with. And everyone aims to achieve the points listed above - However, with all 'best intentions considered'.. it's truly the 'luck of the draw' as to whether or not you find the one who 'clicks' with you on every level... so, when you do, or if you have, live by the motto 'Keep the fights clean & the sex dirty!!!'

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Now run along and get y'erself some DIRTYYYY ;o)

Cheers!!

Chick xo