A little somethin' new to think about...

Welcome to the blog of a chick who feels best while strutting in heels ;o)

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Men complaining about their wives... and sex lives

I was out & about today and stopped to grab a bite. At the table next to me were two middle aged fellas. I couldn't help but overhear their conversation.. it was crowded so they weren't being shy about their topic of choice.. wife bashing. This wasn't all encompassing wife bashing but rather, it was focused on complaining about how their wives no longer 'put out'. I think my ears naturally perk up when I hear anything regarding sex lol!! So, as I sipped on my iced tea I listened - and attempted to hide my "it's been 4 days since I got f.cked" smile ;o)

From what I could gather one guy mentioned how he never gets regular sex. How he has to WISH for it on a special occasion and even THEN it's not guaranteed. He went on to talk about how he had to make these grandiose plans to go out of town on romantic trips to get laid!!! He even mentioned having to go all the way to Vegas with his wife because the 2-hour drive to to a country resort just didn't cut it... (FYI from where I live , Vegas is a 5 hour flight). These guys sounded so defeated. I was once married to a man with a non-existent libido... I could relate.

I have a really hard time understanding why some women withhold sex??? Does it become less important to them once they have been married for a while??? I mean, if you VALUE your marriage you'll want to ensure your partner is happy in EVERY way. Why don't people see that having a 'dry spell' in a relationship is a DANGER ZONE!!!! Sending a guy, who hasn't had sex in a while, out in to the wild... is dangerous!! Someone who is hungry... sooner or later... is going to EAT!!! Take it from someone who has been there.

I often think, I want my guy to be the one who is the most satisfied in the room when he talks about me ;o) ...Oh, and he is!!! I do not want to give him reason to even consider swaying... On the other hand, I do wonder what kind of effort these guys are putting in?? I mean, sure the romantic trips are great - but are they lazy slugs on a daily basis - cuz' that's certainly NOT attractive. Connections cannot just show up on birthdays or vacations.. but if you aren't having sex allow me to enlighten you - SEE THE BIG HUGE RED FLAGS WAVING IN YOUR FACE!!!!

Who would have thought I'd end up with an earful like I did today from a quick lunch stop?! I did enjoy carrying the scenario over to my fantasy life tho.. ya know, who doesn't want to be taken on a table top in a restaurant??? Oops... did I say that out loud?!?

Be in touch with the satisfaction of your love life... be proactive... you don't want to be the topic of negative lunchtime conversations....

Somethin' to think about... Subscribe here, email me at chicktidbits@live.ca - visit my sister site for free love/sex/dating advice http://chick-advice-4u.blogspot.com comment here, vote.. and come back often ;o)

Cheers xo!!


Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Sex in a car ..or truck ..or anything u can park!!

So maybe this hadn't crossed your mind since the teen years.. but I am here to say THINK AGAIN!! I mean, why not?!? What was enticing about having sex in a car when you were a teenager still holds true as an adult.. It's exciting, it's risky, it's naughty, it's spontaneous and it's FUN!! I am sure that most adult relationships could use a little FRISKINESS every now and again - am I wrong??

Most of us have jobs, maybe children and responsibilities that are extremely time consuming. Once you have a home and a bed to have sex in - the excitement of 'where and when' to get kinky can fade out. Even transferring from the couch to the bedroom can lose some of the anticipation and spontaneity. A bedroom is surely great to maximize position potential - but for many couples, regular sex in the bedroom can become routine. Changing up the plans or the environment can add a whole lot of spice to the mix every now and again. For this, I suggest giving sex in a car a consideration.

I like to roll play when the potential for sex in a car comes about. Ya know, the 'we just met' situation or 'maybe he picked me up at the corner for a good time'.. Remember the passion you had as a teen when you made out in the car - you'll find that doesn't go away - but now you are older and wiser and may even be a bit more experienced when it comes to maximizing positions!!
Whether it's reclined bucket seating or full on back seat bench play - there are so many options. Riding reverse cowgirl, girl on top, guy on top, doggie, or my fav - girl on top in the squat position with her feet on the seat tee hee!! ;o) Just ensure it's dark outside and that you've staked out a secluded spot. Country roads are devine for this!!

Lock the doors, turn up the kink & have fun fogging up the windows!!!!!

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Cheers xo!


Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Reuniting after a break up???.... NEVERRRRR!!!

Okay so this is one of my biggest rules of dating & relating... Never.. N-E-V-E-R.. ever reunite with someone you were once in a relationship with. We all know someone who has done this, or we ourselves have - those couples who are 'on again - off again' - 'break up then get back together' - the ones who explain the length of their relationship as "well, all together we've been together ***, minus the break ups of course." WHAT IS THAT?!?

Now, I'm not merely talking arguments here.. because EVERYONE has their differences and their fights - that's normal, that's life. (For the couple who you think doesn't ever fight - they lie!). Disagreements however, are different - they do NOT cross the line. When the words 'we're over, we're through, I don't want to be with you anymore, I'm done with this, I don't love you anymore, etc... are uttered - don't plan on calling the bluff. Why???? Because whatever gut-wrenching pain it may induce is guaranteed to be so much worse the next time it happens - and mark my words - it WILL happen again. Another clue, if you have not reconnected in some form within 24 hours of a fight - consider that a huge warning sign - the easier it is to be apart in times of struggle the more likely it is that the torment will repeat and be worse the next time around.

What happens when you've broken up, your friends & family have made their opinions of your dreadful ex known.. how do you (and your reunited partner) plan on dealing with that side of things as you plan on trying again. Now, don't kid yourself - I am fully supportive of giving a relationship every chance to survive and thrive - but a hard and fast rule of mine is that I do not break up and get back together again. It's an important topic to discuss with your partner, so that you are taken seriously if he/she ever considers walking away - that they should be sure before crossing the line.
If you are reading this and have experienced heart ache - believe me when I tell you - you ARE better off without that person. No one should feel they aren't worthy of being with a partner who WANTS to be there. Difficult as moving on may be, take it as a lesson and BELIEVE that you are no longer wasting time with the wrong person... which means, the right person is even closer to your door step! If you are the one who initiates the break up - don't fall into old routines just for security's sake. If you let go - do everyone a favour and don't play both sides of the fence. Bottom line for everyone involved, you break up for a REASON and a one time break is always enough.

Stay strong... move along ;o)

Vote on the poll listed above, email me any topic suggestions or ??'s of advice (you can remain anonymous) to chicktidbits@live.ca, comment, subscribe & visit me here any ol' time!!!

Cheers xo!


Friday, March 13, 2009

Bromance ...gotta love it!

"Oh, Paul Rudd is dreamy. . . So one time I was fast asleep on the couch, and I just feel Paul and his gentle touch on my shoulder going, 'Hey, Jase, wake up. It’s time to wake up, buddy. Wake up.' And I slowly open my eyes, and Paul is standing there with his dick out. And he just gives me this weird, mischievous smile and walked out of the room."

- Jason Segel on his I Love You Man co-star Paul Rudd, to
Time Out NY
Okay so I admit it, that quote was cause for a naughty little smirk on my face ;o) A secret turn-on for me is being witness to a good ol' bromance. Bromance is described as the complicated love and affection shared by two straight males. There is something enticing about two straight guys who can 'borderline' flirt with one another. Let's be clear though, we aren't talking about guys who are gay or effeminate in any way... These are what I like to describe as a 'guy's guy'. They are easy going, they tend to have a devilishly-delicious sense of humour and they have close guy-friends who they can joke around with hilarious innuendo.

This type of 'bromance' doesn't happen in just ANY guy friendship, it has to be special. There is a level of comradery that is a very fine mix. These guys are close - they can talk about anything together and they are usually familiar with the raunchiest of skeletons in each other's closets. They know anything and everything about each other's sexual escapades, generally share similar likes and dislikes, often times engage in the same sports or hobbies and REALLY enjoy one another's company. It's just like having a crush but between guys!

You know the ones, the guys in the locker room who can whip each other's butts with a tightly wound wet towel ;o) Bromances just happen to be on the top of my list of turn-ons!! There's something frighteningly kinky about two straight guys sharing a little good flirting ;o) If you are a guy and you simply cannot relate to this - picture it in reverse - what guy doesn't find it a little hawt to witness two girls joking around and being flirty together?! See....

So tell me, have you experienced a bromance? Comment here, vote, email me at chicktidbits@live.ca and subscribe!!

Let's hear it for the boyz!!! You know who you are... ;o)

Cheers xo!


Saturday, March 7, 2009

SEX... yes, it's ALWAYS on my mind ;o)

I recently read a quote by Mel B. of the Spice Girls and she said something along the lines about not knowing anyone who has a sex drive like she does - and I thought 'ME TOO!!!' Admittedly, it's crazy how often I think of (and want) sex!!! I swear, I could challenge the most hormone raging teenaged boy over how often sex comes across my mind ;o) Apparently, the average male apparently thinks about sex every 7 seconds - k, I've gotta be around the 3.5 second mark here and I do *not* have a penis lol!!

And when I think about it, often times it's a thought so intense that I can FEEL it creating warmth & *tingles* in all the right places ;o) I call that the 'F-oner' - female+boner if you will (a.k.a. bloodflow to the clitoris) ;o) If I see a couple walking together I'll often think 'hmm.. wonder what they look like having sex?!' - If I catch a couple making out on TV it stirs something in me.. the juices flow very easily for someone who is so sexually charged ;o) Watching porn is always a turn-on too - I appreciate the stuff that looks legit versus staged tho... A few of the pass times of a highly-jacked chickee ;o)

I'm thankful enough to be with a fella who obliges at my every request when it comes to my crazy sex drive!! Thing is, often times once orgasm is achieved it just sets off a whole new level where I want it even more ;o) It opens the floodgates!!! Even after multiple orgasms during sex there are some times where I'll want to cap it off with a little self stimulation as well. Plus, at that point I have my fella as my audience/assistant so why not?!

For those of us who are highly sexual creatures masturbation is a necessity. There have been times when I've been guilty of self pleasuring myself while driving - admittedly tho I was in traffic & for safety reasons I do not recommend it lol! Surprisingly enough tho, I am not a fan of artificial stimulation (vibrators, etc) - they can be fun for a little kink every now and again but they are NOTHING in comparison to genuine skin on skin contact ;o)

If you have a high sex drive it's usually very easy for that to be interpreted physically. For guys it means they can get an erection almost instantly and for women it means you get wet and turned on very easily. There have been times when my cravings have been so high that by the time I have sex there is a huge flow of juices released out of me. I imagine this has a lot to do with being easily turned on, afterall if sex was a DRY topic and uncomfortable ya wouldn't crave it so much.

This doesn't mean that because you are highly sexual being that you are easy or out to do every thing that walks by. It does however mean that sex is important to you and when you are in a relationship you will tend to be very... very sexually active ;o) But hey, consider that an extraordinary connection instead of a vice!

I don't look at my affliction as a bad thing however... I find sex to be exhilarating, healthy and fulfilling in so many ways. If sex is my favourite hobby over say.. knitting, then that's a-okay with me ;o) I do realize that it is not common for women to be the ones with the higher sex drive. It has been difficult to relate to women who are of the majority view point with regards to sex. But hey, this is why I blog - if I had the same views as everyone else wouldn't that be boring??

Share your thoughts on this one... vote, subscribe, comment & email me your topic suggestions or even requests for advice to chicktidbits@live.ca

Cheers xo!!


Wednesday, March 4, 2009

SHE'S just not that into you...

She’s just not that into you... Okay so we’ve all heard about the trials & tribulations which inspired the ‘He’s Just Not That Into You’ book turned movie (loved it btw!!)... but how about the reverse??? It seems to me that guys, being the natural hunters that they are, often times miss the cues that women give THEM when SHE’S just not that into you. Many guys continue to aimlessly persist with the hunt.

First of all, as is true with both sexes if the person you are pursuing doesn’t make themselves available to see you at every opportunity they can – then it’s true – their interest level is not equivalent to yours. Especially when it comes to women, if they are interested in seeing you – they will. Of course the obvious exception is work – but everyone gets a lunch break right?! The point is, there are always WAYS to see one another. With all of the conveniences of technology available – texting, social networking sites, messenger, and who doesn’t have a cell phone these days?! ...there are no more excuses for not being in contact – other than lack of interest.

These cues are all a part of making an effort. If you do not SEE an effort being made in response to your advances – well, there is a reason for that – not an excuse, but a reason. Take notice in how a woman dresses when she is with you. I mean, sure – she’s dressed but does is it obvious to you that she put quite a bit of effort into her looks when you had plans together? Did she recently get her hair done before your date?? Nails maybe – that’s a good indication! Is she flirty when she’s with you & maintain eye contact – if not, guess what... that’s a sign of disinterest. If she does not initiate contact – be it by communication or even when it comes to being physical – again take note. Does she respond to your attempts at contact with equal levels of response?? (i.e.: a text for a text, a call for a call) if a girl is truly interested you will not have to wait or pursue or...AND THIS IS KEY... wonder! If it’s legit you won’t have to question her interest – you’ll already know. If you’re fooling yourself that she’s playing hard to get or taking things slow – consider yourself now informed – she’s just not that into you.

If a woman is truly interested she will think about her fella constantly – I mean, we’re multi-taskers at heart so if we have interest in you, in one way or another, you are always on our minds. If you don’t catch that vibe – that sparkle in our eyes when we talk to you – the smile you can hear over the phone when we speak – if that’s not obvious (because it should be if we’re really into you) then take note – interest levels are definitely not in sync.

The thing is, being knowledgeable when coming to terms with this is actually to your benefit. No one should be left hanging and if you are then you are wasting time. When in doubt – move on fellas.. when it’s real it’s easy & there is no doubt. Hanging onto hopeless hope only keeps the ‘right one’ further away – release the grip and embrace the next turn on your path ;o)

Email me your topic suggestions or requests for advice
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Cheers xo!